Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Airport security - dont bother asking


I used to like flying, I used to like it alot.
I suppose a great deal of my enjoyment was based on the fact that flying was like a real life google earth (I have called it this on multiple occasions).
Times have changed... the novelty I once enjoyed has been replaced with complete loathing for the amount of my life that is wasted in queues for queues, and spent answering absurdly stupid questions. Questions such as "did you pack your bags yourself" are surely unneeded, I think the late George Carlin put it very well when talking about the question "have your bags been in your possession the whole time"

No. Usually the night before I travel – just as the moon is rising – I place my suitcases out on the streetcorner and leave them there, unattended, for several hours. Just for good luck.

The one that really gets me is the set of questions they see fit to ask you on the USA visa waiver form, the little green form that no one can ever figure out how to complete (In Dublin airport they now have people dedicated to telling you how, nice design eh?).
The questions that are most ridiculous are to be found on the back of the form.
The first question regarding communicable diseases is fair enough, however if you were afflicted with yellow fever, and you really wanted to get into the USA would you really tell them? My personal favourite is:
"Have you ever been or are you now involved in espionage or sabotage; or in terrorist activities; or genocide; or between 1933 and 1945 were you involved, in any way, in persecutions associated with Nazi Germany or its allies?"
Again, this may indeed be information that the US government would like to know, but do they truly believe that any person who fits this bill will ever tick "yes"?

Questions like these are a stupid waste of time, I would assume that no sane person who actually wanted to enter the US would ever tick yes to any of these questions, if you know you will be lied to, don't bother asking, and let me get on my damn plane

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